Need Direction

Last week, a friend of mine gave me a book called 'Pivotal Praying' by John Hull & Tim Elmore. At first I thought, I don't want to read another self help book! I was angry at God and didn't understand why this happend again. It is funny how the very thing that don't we feel we don't need, ends up being the biggest help. The book has helped tremendously. It talks about learning how to pray and what to say when situations don't turn out the way we want or when tragedy strikes. I highly recommend this book!

I am still struggling with direction. I am seeking God in knowing what to do next. What do I need to learn from all of this? What is the next step? I'm sure you all know that I desperately want to have another child. I want to know if this is what He has for me? I really am trying not to dwell on it. I guess it bothers me the most to let go of my dream. Learning to die to myself and live for Christ is not as easy as it sounds. Lord please help me.

My mother told me about a job working with mom's at risk of having low birth weight babies. The position would involve counseling mothers and helping them get the help they need in order to deliver healthy babies. I sent my resume but the job is only part time. It sounds crazy to give up a full time job for a part time job. I just feel like I need to make a difference and I didn't feel like I was doing that in my other job. I wonder what my husband will say. I guess we can cross that bridge if things go that far.

My days have been ok. I am trying to stay busy but I am running out of clothes to wash and I'm not even sure I should be doing that! I can't stand just sitting here sometimes. If I could move around a little more there are a ton of projects I could start. Well, I guess I need a little money too!

Hoping to have another good day!